Women: when was the last time you had a real orgasm? One that fulfilled you? One that left you feeling whole and complete? I’m not talking about just a brief climax but an orgasm that left you feeling alive and at one with the universe. If it was recently then good for you!
If you are like a lot of women, chances are it’s been awhile or you might even have never experienced one. There’s an abundance of excuses including cultural and religious taboos, lack of comfort with your body, or some other excuse. If you are a western woman you might be saying things like: I work too hard, I eat too much, I diet too much, I drink too much, I shop too much, I give too much, etc. Excuses abound but where are the solutions?
Nicole Daedone, founder of OneTaste and author of Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm, was invited to give a talk in the 2011 TEDxSF conference about this very subject. In a very frank, intelligent and witty speech, Nicole addresses a topic that’s often considered tabu.
Nicole has developed a process called Orgasmic Meditation whose aim is to help quench the fundamental hunger that women have to connect with herself and others. The three fundamental precepts for this this process are:
- Orgasm is vital for every single woman on the planet
- It’s not so bad for guys either
- It roots our fundamental capacity for connection.
Orgasmic Meditation does not involve sex toys or calling your genitals weird names or running around naked in front of a group. It simply involves having your partner spend 15 minutes devoted solely to loving your genitalia. Your partner can describe sights, smells, sensations, etc. No intercourse is allowed, just attention and devotion. These 15 minutes of total adoration to a part of your body that you’ve been taught to hide and be ashamed of, becomes a life changing experience that fills that sense of hunger that you never quite get over in normal intercourse.
The key, however, is to get rid of the traffic jam that’s going on inside your head. Stop thinking about how you look, or what you have to do tomorrow, or whether your partner is enjoying the experience, or whether the ceiling needs a new coat of paint. Just feel. Get out of your head and give in to the experience. In Nicole’s own words: “[It became a] clean, powerful, and deeply pleasurable fuel I could use for whatever it was I wanted to do with my life.”
Try it and it will convince you. The worse thing you have to lose is 15 minutes of your life but you might just lose that hopelessness that you’ll ever be reached inside.
To learn more about Nicole Daedon and Orgasmic Mediation go here.
To view the TEDxSF video on Youtube go here.