Tag: attitude

A Positive Attitude During Difficult Times

We are told that if life gives you lemons you should make lemonade.  But let’s face it, sometimes you want to throw that lemon right back with as much force as you can muster.  When you’re facing an empty refrigerator, or an eviction notice, or the loss of a loved one, it is hard to see the positive side of life and remain happy and strong.  In theory we know we should maintain a positive attitude but putting it into practice in real life is hard.  Or is it?  The fictional story below is an inspiring example of how one person managed to make lemonade even when faced with his mortality.  Enjoy!

Jerry is the manager of a restaurant in America. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would always reply, “If I were any better, I would be twins!” Many of the waiters at his restaurant quit their jobs when he changed jobs; they would follow him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was always there, telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, “I don’t get it! No one can be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?”

Jerry replied, “Each morning I wake up and say to myself, I have two choices today. I can choose to be in a good mood or I can choose to be in a bad mood. I always choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I always choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I always choose the positive side of life.”

“But it’s not always that easy,” I protested.

“Yes, it is,” Jerry said, “Life is all about choices When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. It’s your choice how you live your life.”

Several years later, I heard that Jerry accidentally did something you are never supposed to do in the restaurant business: he left the back door of his restaurant open one morning and was robbed by three armed men. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found quickly and rushed to the hospital. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, “If I were any better, I’d be twins. Want to see my scars?”

I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place.
“The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door,” Jerry replied. “Then, after they shot me, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or choose to die. I chose to live.”

“Weren’t you scared?” I asked.

Jerry continued, “The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the Emergency Room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read ‘He’s a dead man.’ I knew I needed to take action.”

“What did you do?” I asked. “Well, there was a big nurse shouting questions at me,” said Jerry. “She asked if I was allergic to anything.” ‘Yes,’ I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, ‘Bullets!’ Over their laughter, I told them, ‘I am choosing to live. Please operate on me as if I am alive, not dead’.

Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude.

Whether we want to admit it or not, we always have a choice.  We can choose to remain bitter or to smile and move on.  We can choose to remain chained by fear or break those chains and start enjoying life.  We can choose to live, or we can choose to die.   The choice is always yours to make.  No one else can make it for you.

 

This story is courtesy of the View on Buddhism website.

To purchase a copy of the image on this post go to Adila’s site on Deviantart.

Mind Tattoos

You choose what you tattoo on your mind.  Good or bad, that tattoo is up to you.

Dr. Norman Vincent Peale was walking by a tattoo shop when a confused looking young man came out of the shop with a tattoo in his right arm that read “Born to Lose”. Dr Peale asked the tattoo artist about it and the tattoo artist replied…. “ I did ask the young man if he was sure that he wanted to state “Born to lose” in his arm and the young man was pretty stubborn in that. A surprised Dr Peale asked the tattoo artist – “Is’nt that surprising?” For which the artiste replied “Not really! Much before he tattooed it on his arm, he has firmly tattooed it in his brain, and his body tattoo act is just a reflection of his mind tattoo”.

Tattoos are a way of expressing to the world what is important to us.  What we believe in and hold dear to our hearts.  But what happens when that tattoo is something that you have firmly etched in your mind?  No one can see it but you.  It’s that experience you keep re-living.  It’s that contest that you won, or the feelings of defeat when you lost.  It’s the mother who told you that you could do anything and the bully who told you that you weren’t capable of doing anything.

We may not be entirely conscious of mind tattoos or even aware of how they got there.  They might have gotten there over constant repetition, like when a child is told over and over again that a child is seen and not heard.  Or they might have gotten there through a misunderstanding, like when parents get a divorce and a child believes its his/her fault.

No matter how these tattoos got there, we must first be able to become aware of them if we are going to decide whether or not we’re going to let them stay or if we are going to take that mental laser and remove them.  Don’t think you have any mind tattoos?  You’d be surprised by the true answer.  Ask someone who knows you and you trust to tell if they think you have any mental images of yourself that you just can’t seem to get out of your head, even if you’ve never voiced them.

So now that you’ve identified, how do you remove them?  Why not replace any negative ones with thoughts of the things you want to achieve?  Replace that thought of losing with a thought of winning.  Instead of seeing in your mind over and over again how you failed someone, picture instead how you will be there when someone needs you.  Stop blaming the person that you perceived to have put it there.  Instead focus on re-taking control of who and what is allowed into your mind.